I Don't Want to Join the Army
Tune:  Itself 

I don't want to join the army
I don't want to go to war
I'd rather hang around
Piccadilly underground
Living off the earnings of an high class lady
Don't want a bayonet up me arsehole
Don't want me bollocks shot away
I'd rather stay in London
Bonny bloody London
And fornicate me bloomin' life away, gor blimey

Monday I touched her on the ankle
Tuesday I touched her on the knee
Wednesday, Success!
I lifted up her dress
Thursday I saw you know what
Friday I put me hand upon it
Saturday she gave me balls a tweak (tweak! tweak!)
Sunday after supper
I put the old boy up her
Now she earns me 40 bob a week, gor blimey

Call for the regimental army
Call for the navy and marines
Call for me mother,
Me sister and me brother
But for Gawd's sake, don't call me

Drink it down, down, down, down,


Everyone seems to sing this differently. Slightly different words, slightly different tunes, different meter and rhythm. This is just how I sing it.

Click here to return to the index of 1st lines.

Created   :   2003 August 27
Modified   :   2004 March 1; October 26; November 10; 2005 November 11; 2006 January 28: 2010 February 24
Author   :   Jeff "Little Head" Hutchinson
E-mail   :   Hutchinson dot Jeff at gmail dot com
URL   :   https://littlehead-dh3.angelfire.com/words/joinarmy.html
Copyright   :   2003-2010