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The Lobster Song
Tune:  Itself 

"Oh, Mister Lobsterman, home from the sea,
Have you got a lobster you will sell to me?"

      Chorus:
Singing ai-diddly-ai, shit or bust,
Never let your bollocks dangle in the dust.

"Yes sir, yes sir, I have three,
And the biggest of the bastards I will sell to thee."
      -Chorus-
So I took the lobster home, but I couldn't find a dish,
So I put him in the pot where the missus takes a piss.
      -Chorus-
In the middle of the night, as you well know,
The missus got up for to have a heave ho.
      -Chorus-
Well, the missus gave a groan, and the missus gave a grunt,
Now she got the bloody lobster swinging from her cunt.
      -Chorus-
The missus grabbed the brush, and I grabbed the broom,
And we chased the bloody lobster all around the room.
      -Chorus-
We hit it on the head, we hit it on the side,
We hit that bloody lobster until the bastard died.
      -Chorus-
Oh, the story has a moral, and this is it,
Always take a look before you take a shit.
      -Chorus-
That's the end of my story, there ain't no more,
There's an apple up my arsehole, and you can have the core.
      -Chorus-
Down in Nagasaki the monkey fucked the cat,
And all the cat could do was fuck the monkey back.
      -Chorus-
Drink it down, down, down, down

 

Learned this one first from Big Bird and Birdman, when I first started Hashing. Then, from Sinbad.

Click here to return to the index of 1st lines.


Created   :   2004 October 27
Modified   :   2004 October 28; 2005 November 11; 2006 January 28: 2010 February 24
Author   :   Jeff "Little Head" Hutchinson
E-mail   :   Hutchinson dot Jeff at gmail dot com
URL   :   http://LittleHead-DH3.angelfire.com/words/lobster.html
Copyright   :   2004-2010