The Alcoholics Anthem
Tune:  Men of Harlech 

What's the point of drinking tea?
Indulging in sobriety
And teetotal perversity?
It's healthier to booze.

What's the use of milk and water?
These are drinks that never oughter
Be allowed in any quarter.
Come on, lose your blues!

Mix yourself a shandy.
Drown yourself in brandy.
Sherry sweet or whiskey neat
Or any kind of liquor that is handy.

There's no blinkin' sense in drinkin'
Anything that doesn't make you stinkin'.
There's no happiness like sinkin'
Blotto to the floor.

Put an end to all frustration.
Drinking can be your salvation.
End it all in dissipation,
Rotten to the core.

Aberrations metabolic,
Ceilings that are hyperbolic:
These are for the alcoholic
Lying on the floor

Vodka for the arty,
Gin to make you hearty!
Lemonade was only made
For drinking when your mother's at the party.

Just steer clear of Coors beer
And anything that isn't labeled clear.
There is nothing else to fear.
Bottoms up, me boys!

 

I like this song immensely! I think we should sing it before every Trail, or at the beginning of Circle. Nobody else seems to like it at all. Possibly the problem is that it's long and fairly complicated. (Of course, the complicated rhyming is part of why I like it.) Another possibility is that “Men of Harlech” is not the easiest song in the world to sing.

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Created   :   2004 October 27
Modified   :   2005 November 11; 2006 January 28; 2009 October 14: 2010 February 24
Author   :   Jeff "Little Head" Hutchinson
E-mail   :   Hutchinson dot Jeff at gmail dot com
URL   :   https://littlehead-dh3.angelfire.com/words/alconthm.html
Copyright   :   2004-2010